Jul 25, 2009

Texas in July

You Know You Are In Texas In July When...

  1. The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
  2. The trees are whistling for the dogs.
  3. The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
  4. Hot water now comes out of both taps. You can make sun tea instantly.
  5. You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
  6. The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
  7. You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
  8. You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
  9. You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
  10. You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
  11. Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is: "What if I get knocked out, end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
  12. You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
  13. The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out, and add butter, salt and pepper.
  14. Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.
  15. The cows are giving evaporated milk.

Ah, what a place to call home. God Bless The State of TEXAS !!!


A girl needs to be so lost in God, that the guy is going to have to seek HIM to find her!


Andrea said...

I have never been to Texas. Now, I will be sure to visit in spring or fall if I come....definitely not summer!


sara said...

LOL!!! those were great!! And several of them could be used for Arkansas in the summer too!

Tammy said...

I can so relate. I lived in ElPaso from late August to March. Those are considered the cooler months and I thought it was a little warm.

love and hugs~Tammy

Lelia Chealey said...

How funny. I'm going to email this to my friend Missy in TX.

Sue J. said...

This reads like a page out of the ADHDMe handbook for funny posts!

I hope you are dealing with Texas and all it offers, even in the dog days. (When the dogs prefer to lie under the trees instead of....)


Debbie said...

Gosh Edie, it sounds a bit like Phoenix. This was very funny!

BTW, I'm going to get a message off to you this weekend. I've been crazy busy, it seems.

Hugs and love to you.

My ADHD Me said...

To Texas from Virginia...

This was SO funny. I really laughed out loud.

2. ROFLOL!! (well, minus the ROF part, I might not be able to get back up)

5. Makes me remember trying to put the kids in the car seats without branding them for life!

6. If only the heat index would drop that low also!

7. WAHAHAHA....I've definitely done that!

10. If only there was a way to keep my make-up from melting off of my face between the door and the car.

12. Don't you love the sound your sneakers make after you've walked on asphalt and then they stick to everything else you walk on?

13, 14, 15- WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Another Thing to be thankful for- Air Conditioning!!!!

Have a great day!

Chatty Kelly said...

Hot enough for you? (Don't you hate it when people ask that dumb question?!)

Eat some ice cream or an iced mocha. Yummy!

An Imperfect Perfection said...

Oh...those are sooo good!

Beverlydru said...

I enjoyed this! And ADHD's laughter is always fun too. Some like it hot, some like it cold. I like it warm. : )

Loren said...


these are sooo true! it has been like this in Florida and also Oklahoma while I was home.....it's just HOT right now!

blessings to you!

Wendy said...

Edie, this was a good one!! Here in Fl. it's close to the same story. I am amazed at how long you have to run cold water to get it room temp. We're putting ice cubes in our pond so the fish don't cook!!

From the Heart said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Andrea said...

If you have time to make a prayer button for ellen and feel led to do so, I would appreciate it. She is a member of the family we are vacationing with. She loves the ocean and did not get to come this year...the first time she has missed in 24 years. They have called her daily....let her hear the waves and she cries with each call.
Blessings, andrea

Melanie said...

I can relate to looking for the parking place in the shade. Even a small tree helps! Worse than the Florida heat is the state bird - the mosquito. The little buggers.

HisPrincess said...

LOL!!! It sounds just like South Australia in February!

Remember when cars had vinyl seats? OUCH!

Chel's Leaving a Legacy said...

OH yeah. I love this post. I don't live in Texas anymore, but I am OH SO familiar with these! Especially the liquid asphalt and the best parking! Oh, and the sweating at 7:30. Yes. True story. Absolutely.

I lived most of my life in South Texas on the coast. That gnarly heat coupled with icing-thick humidity...it's enough to choke ya!

I feel for you this summer; I know it's been really hot this year. Hope you're staying cool indoors til the fall!

Greg C said...

It's about the same here at times. People from up north don't believe #12 but I have seen it many times. Very funny Edie.